The Indecision Refutation


Hey there folks!


For those that noticed I am back from my one day break. I had to get some things taken care of that I have let sit idle for far too long. It seems even though I enjoy being back in my native northern climate, I still have some southern tendencies. Even though life does not come to a screeching halt up here because of snow, like it does in North Carolina, I am finding that snow does make me want to hibernate. Not to mention I am realizing that writing something everyday is a challenging feat, so sometimes I just need to get away from the computer and recharge my batteries.


So, today I want to talk about decision making, which I recognize is strongly connected to confidence, but I feel warrants its own discussion. As I have stated in previous posts, I tend to be that friend that people sit down and talk to about daily stresses and anxieties. I suppose it is just in my nature to be that guy and to be perfectly honest I rather enjoy filling that role. Throughout the years I have watched several people hop back and forth over various decisions, and tried to counsel them as best I could. Let’s be fair there are countless scenarios that life can throw at us, that offer no easy solutions. I know I have had my fair share of these predicaments as well.


One thing that always strikes me in these situations is people’s love of the internal struggle. Even as we complain about having to make the decision, we keep ourselves locked into the struggle between options. I cannot count the number of times I have told someone, or myself, that they just need to pick an option and see how it plays out, and they replied, “yeah I know, but I can’t”. Whenever someone tells me this the first though in my mind is, why the hell not. In fact, they are the only one with the power to choose, and more often than not indecision forces us into a decision.


Personally when I find myself in a situation like this I cannot maintain the internal struggle for very long before I get aggravated. At times this leads me to making a hasty decision, but I always end up making a decision and letting the chips fall where they may. For a long time I never understood why people could not do things as I did and just make a choice. I never saw myself as special in anyway, but as I have grown older I realize that the way I approach many things is directly related to my own confidence levels. Mind you I have my fair share of insecurities and anxieties, but at the end of the day I believe in myself. I know I am an intelligent, capable individual, and one way or another I will handle what life throws at me. I have also come to realize that not everyone believes in themselves as I do.


The way I have come to see things the ability to make a decision relies on two things. First, you have to trust yourself to make a decision. Could you make the wrong choice? Yes. Over a long enough period of time everyone makes a mistake or three. However, just because you have made a mistake in the past does not mean you are incapable of making a good choice today, and if you are going to let fear of failure rule your life you will never get anything done. Second, is the fear that a better answer is just out of sight. Why commit to an answer right now if there may be a better answer just over the horizon? Is it possible that once you commit to a path you will discover a better solution? Once again, yes. It is also possible that you will spend so much time waiting for a better option, that the perfectly good option in front of you right now will go away.


I can draw a perfect parallel to my life as it currently exists. As I have stated many times I am working on developing the habit of writing, because it is my intention to be a writer. I no longer posses the patience to spend my time pursuing anything other than what I love. To this end I have this blog hear, which allows me to communicate with any willing to listen and gives me a place to just practice writing and develop the habit. However, I need money because I am fond of having a roof over my head and food in my belly, so I must truly embrace being a writer and find a way to make my writing make money. The truth is I am coming up on 35 years old. Both of my parents were dead before they reached 55. I believe that I still have plenty of life ahead of me but I have to admit that I am no longer young. If I am ever going to achieve my goals and dreams the time is now, anyone care to join me?


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